Old Familiar Way

I tell Scott what really bothers me. He tells me he's sorry. I tell him it's okay. And then the cycle repeats. I don't know whether it's me being naive or me being in love with him that keeps me believing what he says. You can't change someone--I know that. Actions speak louder than words. Etc.

I don't know what it is about love that makes me addicted. Maybe it's the fact that it has fused itself to each living cell in my body. Maybe it's the fact that my brain has opened up new receptors to accept the drug-like emotion. I don't know how his smile fills me with happiness and I don't know how his touch sends me into realms I never knew existed. But I do know it'd be very hard to live with out those small and seemingly menial, yet wonderfully life-affirming, things. He's driven me to a point where I can't imagine a world with out him. When I think of the future, he's filling up most of it. He's making the glass half full. We were talking about the future, and how I want to do some major traveling after I'm done school. He said "I just hope you don't go anywhere I can't follow."

What is it about wanting Someone to see how we've evolved into the person we are today? Wanting Someone to prove our existence is worthy and just?

Maybe it's the familiarity that I don't want to let go of; everyone has some sort of fear of change embedded into them. But I doubt this Sameness causes my heart to skip a beat and my blood cells to glow.

I'm tired.